How to Spice Up Your Sex Life

Are you tired of the same old sex routine? Do you know exactly what to expect anytime you and your man get frisky? If you’re looking to spice up your sex life, try these tips on for size!

Get Inspired

Spicing up your sex life becomes much easier once you find some inspiration to do so, and the good news is that once you start looking for ideas, you’ll realize how many are available to you.

If you’re unsure of where to start, try the internet. A simple Google search will provide loads of interesting ideas and suggestions for how to turn up the heat between the sheets.

If you’re looking for more of a demonstration than a to-do list, then consider checking out an adult movie or two. If porn isn’t your thing, or you feel guilty watching it because you’re not a fan of your man doing so, then consider it “research.” Since there is no shortage of different types of porn and fetish films you won’t have a problem finding something that turns you on.

Be sure to make note of the types of things that get your heart racing and share those things with your man. You might choose to keep secret how you came about your latest orgasmic discovery and surprise him with it, or you may tell him you saw something you’d like the two of you to try out.

Take time to think about and discover what turns you on, and what your sexual fantasies entail. Doing so will be incredibly helpful for spicing up your sex life.

Create Anticipation

An easy and extremely powerful way to stir up sexual tension and desire is by building anticipation.

To do this make it known to your partner that you cannot wait to see him, and tell him some of the things you have planned for the two of you. Since it can be awkward saying these things over the phone, consider texting him your intentions.

How direct you are in relying this information is completely up to you. However, if you’re looking to really turn up the heat between the two of you then you’re going to want to give him some vivid imagery to look forward to. The more of a mental image you can give him the better, so be sure to use descriptive words in your messages.

If you’re new to sexting or don’t feel comfortable saying directly what you have planned then you can also be a bit vague in your texts and still get him hooked. For example, a text like “I can’t wait to see you tonight. The things I want to do to you…” will keep you on his mind and have him counting the minutes until you’re together.

Create an Atmosphere

Set the tone for your sexual rendezvous, but first ask yourself what kind of sexual experience are you hoping to explore.

For instance, do you want to have a passionate, romantic encounter with candles and sensual music, or are you looking for something raunchier with props and edible creams?

Do you want to do it in the heat of the moment, naked on the bedroom floor, or are you hoping to prolong it with a steamy bed session? Be sure to switch things up and create different atmospheres for different encounters. Rose petals will set the mood for a night of sweet love making, but a whip and handcuffs calls for a completely different experience.

Wear Sexy Lingerie

After being with someone for a while you become familiar with their undergarments. In other words, your man has probably seen most of your bras and panties, and may not be as excited by them as he was when you first started hooking up.

To spice up your sex life consider investing in some new lingerie, and when you do, change things up. Meaning if you usually go for the standard black bra, get something completely different. From leather and lace, to sheer and stringy, introducing new pieces and colours into your wardrobe can reintroduce the mystery and attraction.

To compliment your sexy pieces try different hairstyles or makeup combinations, and be sure to smell fresh. This will be intoxicating.

Invest in Foreplay

When couples become busy in their everyday lives it can be tough to find time for sex, yet alone foreplay. However, if you want to spice up your sex life then you’ll want to stop rushing to the act itself, and instead invest time in exploring and playing with one another’s bodies.

From steamy kisses and running fingertips, to oral and stimulation, these are all a part of creating an unforgettable experience for both you and your man.

Massage oils, vibrators and other sex toys will not only help bring you both close to climax before even having sex, but it will also make you feel closer to one another during the act.

Take the Lead

Actions speak louder than words, so instead of telling your man want you want from him, show him. Taking control of the situation and trying new things will not only take the pressure off him (which believe me, he’ll appreciate), but it also lets him know that you’re looking to try something new.

Perhaps even more importantly, taking the lead will make you radiate confidence, and as well all know, that is the most attractive trait any woman can possess. If you’re looking to really rock his world show him that you love your body and be proud of it. Don’t curl into a ball anytime the sheets get yanked off of you, or dive under covers the moment the light comes on. Instead own what you have and he’ll be in awe of your natural beauty.

Ask What He Wants

Instead of playing the guessing game, ask your guy what he wants from you sexually. Depending on the kind of person he is he’ll either comfortably tell you what he’s longing for, or if he’s the shy type then it may take a bit of show-don’t tell on both of your parts.

If you want your man to open up to you about his sexual interests, preferences and fantasies then it’s important that he feels comfortable doing so. Communication is key here, so be the one to get the conversation going.

If you’re really going to turn up the heat then consider having a safe word incase either of you start to feel overwhelmed or uncomfortable.

Try New Things

The key is a spicy sex life is variety, which is why trying new things is so crucial to keeping the steamy passion alive.

To get started explore fetishes like bondage or role playing with your partner, or create your own games with sexual rewards. Try new positions and do it in different places. In fact, something as simple as mixing up the time of day you and your partner have sex can make a world of difference, and can encourage other changes too.

If your sex life has become stagnant or predictable then refuse to stick to what’s familiar and go for something new. Believe me, your man will be onboard with this.

About Amy North

Amy North is a women's relationship coach and best-selling author from Vancouver, Canada. Her high-acclaimed program "The Devotion System" has helped thousands of women from around the world find (and keep) the man of their dreams.

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