You’ve been spending time with this guy and you’re pretty sure he’s into you. Not only does he make an effort to see you, but he’s not shy to get flirtatious, either. In fact, he may have even dropped subtle hints about wanting to hook up, or maybe he has already opened the door to that possibility.
How can you get him to commit if he’s pushing for sex?
1. Do NOT Put Out
As tempted as you may be to hook up with him, doing so will get you nowhere if you’re looking for a relationship. Why? Because if he’s just in it for the sex then you can pretty much bet on him losing interest when he gets what he wants.
Instead of hopping in bed with him, make him work to win you over, and better yet, make him commit to a relationship you!
It’s been proven that men value women who they have chase and make an effort to get with, so instead of being another notch in his bedpost make it known that you’re looking for something more than a quick hook up. Simply put, don’t sleep with him unless he’s willing to go steady.
If you’re worried about coming across as “square” or “lame,” don’t be. Sure telling him that you don’t put out without a commitment can be awkward, but if you tell him in a way that shows you’re confident then he’ll not only respect your decision, but he may even find himself more attracted to you.
2. Show Him What a Great Catch You Are
Once he realizes that you bring happiness to his life he’ll be more willing to commit to a relationship with you.
This can be tough, especially if he’s really trying to score with you, but by being your positive, outgoing self it won’t take long for him to realize that if he doesn’t lock you down someone else will come along and sweep you off your feet!
To do so it’s important that you find ways to be the best part of his day. Maybe this means being the person who makes him laugh, or perhaps you’re the listener he needs. Whatever is it, when you can make a lasting impression on his day-to-day life he’ll be more inclined to commit to you.
3. Become Less Available
Instead of meeting him anytime he comes calling, show him that you’r busy enjoying your fun-filled life. Why? Because he’s NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND!.. And even if he was, you still wouldn’t be running to his beckoning call.
Now, you may be thinking, “But Amy, I like this guy and if I stop being free when he calls then I won’t see him anymore and will ruin my chances of getting him to commit to me.”
Well there’s a slight possibility that’s true, what’s more likely to happen is that he’ll start missing you and will start to consider the possibility of dating you to make sure that you’re a more permanent and present part of his life.
So, the next time he calls and asks to come over or hang out tell him that you’re busy then suggest getting together another day. Even if you have nothing on the go, letting him think that you do and making him wait to see you will keep you on his mind.
4. Avoid Sexual Situations
This means spending time in public together rather than curled up on his couch in the dark.
By limiting sexual opportunities it’ll not only take the pressure off you, but it’ll also give him the chance to experience you as a person without having that temptation lingering. When possible try to make plans that involve doing fun activities together.
Sex aside though, be careful not to give him the benefits of a relationship without making him commit to one. It’s one thing to spend time together, but it’s another to be his emotional rock and support. Remember, there’s a fine line between friends and lovers. If he’s not willing to commit to you and only you, then you shouldn’t be behaving like his girlfriend.